Matthew Wayne Felder - Online Memorial Website
Memorial Website - Matthew Wayne Felder
This memorial website was created to remember our
Dearest Matthew Wayne Felder
who was born on May 2, 1974; in Houston, Texas.
Matthew was killed on January 5, 2008;
from a train accident in Biloxi, Mississippi
and was laid to rest at
Forest Park Lawndale in Houston, Texas
©Starting Over
By: Paula Miller
June 05, 2009
Updated: December 07, 2016
As I still continue to struggle with life without you now 108 months later, I’m trying to start over again each year you have been gone.
I trust Jesus keeps you with him as you are walking beside him…You started over.
When you made your plans here on earth and they’re now gone… You started over. When you tried your best here on earth, now there’s no more trying…You’ve started over.
I love my children each day and when they grew up and left home, I start over… I do my very best not to show my emotions; that I miss them…I’m starting over again. I pray and pray for God’s help and I don’t get the answers; all I know is…I’m starting over.
When I want to stop because I’ve had my fill and the pain doesn’t go away…or I’ve bottomed out in life’s deepest pit of loosing a child…I’ve started over.
This year has been long and very sad, as I remember the best of each day I had with you, my son…I start over when the year ends, then God gives me another month of which I start over.
Starting over means: “Victories Won”
Starting over means: “A Race Well Ran”
Starting over means: “The Lord’s Will be Done”
So I need not just sit here…I can START OVER !
Never, ever forgetting my angel son, I know of his presence around me as he watches me start over.
I Love & Miss You so much my son
Your Mom
Forever & Forever !!!
©On Your Birthday
By: Paula L Miller
May 2nd, 2009
No more cake, no more candles to blow out…no more laugher and singing Happy Birthday to you!…no balloons that has “HAPPY BIRTHDAY on them and what about those presents you would have been opening; those gifts will not have the wrapping paper off to see what is in the package.
We will not be able to see your smile and happiness of what you got for your birthday…
We now celebrate your life in a different way, the one that we can’t talk with you about, the memories we now share with one another, so Happy Birthday to you my Darling Matthew and we’re hoping that somehow you can see and know that we have not stopped thinking of you.
We remember you even though you’ve departed from our view and if you see us here below and wonder why we are here…it’s because we love and miss you so much and want you to know we care and it’s just because we want to show you that even though you are a part of us, you are still here and you live within each one of our heart and we will always have the memories to go with us every day that you have been gone.
Just remember my darling son; you will remain with all of us until we all meet again.
Happy birthday son,
Mom…
Forever, forever and forever…
The Best of Matthew's Memories
Matthew always had a smile on his face, he loved to take pictures. I told him, you are just too cute. He would laugh about that or give me a little grin...
My Matthew was kind and had a heart of gold, he loved to help everyone and treat his family and friends out to eat. Matthew loved life and was a free spirit.
He was so smart, he loved math and read a lot, stories of old days with the guns and cowboy stuff and other books, then there were the Steven King books, I told him I didn't think those books were any good, he would tell me " Oh Mom, it's ok, I am reading because I like it".
Matthew loved to fish, and have B.B.Q outings, he was a good cook. He also loved to fix his vehicles. When he wanted to hunt, he would really ruff it out, including the camp fire was his favorite.
He loved Christmas especially the lights. He would say "Hey Mom lets drive over to that subdivisions and wait in line to drive around and see all the Christmas lights and stuff".
He always liked to spend time with his friends and family. He loved hugs and when you would talk with him, he listened to every word, and he kept his thoughts to himself.
I know that he will always be in my heart and missed every day.
Matthew was loved by all; my son; now my "angel son".
Happy "Father's Day"
My Precious Angel
Matthew this is the fifth (5th) holiday of the year and you will miss out on your FATHER's day with your four ( 4 ) precious little children. I know that you loved each one with all your heart. Matthew as I was putting up your wallet I saw that you had pictures of all four ( 4 ) children placed in the middle of your wallet at the time of your death. This lets me know you thought about them all the time and dreamed of that perfect life with them. Teaching them how to fish, cook, build things, go hunting, cheering on the sports teams, and just hanging out talking about life in general. I am so missing that for you.
Matthew, you were so proud to be a father of two ( 2 ) sons and two ( 2 ) daughters. I know that you missed each one dearly and wished you was more in their lives than what you were. Matthew's children were all under the age of 12 years old.
God bless you, Matthew, I love you and miss you deeply. You will always be at home in my heart and I will always keep you in my thoughts and prayers forever. I know you are now in control of your children and you now have the duty of watching over them each day of each hour and guiding them along in life with keeping them safe from all harm. I pray for each one of your children in hopes that I will be able to see them again one day, which will bring you back to me in them even for a brief moment. Your children are so precious to me; that they remind me of you. I ask that you guide them to make good decisions though out life and oh give them a nudge to call me sometimes.
On Sunday, June 15, 2008, I will stop for several minutes to pray and remember our good times.
I love you son.
Happy Father's day.!
Mom
Thank you so much, Ruth, for this beautiful graphic for
Matthew for his father's day gift.
Ruth is the twin sister to Angel Jose Carlos Figueira.
www.jose-figueira.memory-of.com.
The Lord's Prayer
Our Father,
who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name,
They Kingdom come,
Thy will be done, on earth as it
is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
and forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation
but deliver us from evil.
For thine is the Kingdom,
the power, and the glory,
for ever and ever.
Amen.
Thank You For Stopping By!
I know that Mom will enjoy your comments you
have for me.
Please light a candle to let my Mom know you came by,
I know she will appreciate it.
Also please visit: http://remembering-matthew.memory-of.com this is my first website that my mom made for me, she is doing a wonderful job, I know she loves and misses me; so let her know that you think of me and add her to your prayers.
My Mom's special Angel -
Now in heaven watching YOU Mom...
Thank You and
Love to All,
Matthew Wayne Felder, Sr.
©Reflections Without You
By: Paula Miller
January 05, 2009
Today marks another year that you have been an angel in Heaven, I reflect over the year of your absence. As each month went by this year the pain never went away. As the year marks a celebration your memory is stained in my brain forever. As a moment of each day goes by you are there reminding me you are okay…As your 34th birthday came I wondered what we would be dong…As reflections over this one year without you doesn’t get any better, what shall I do? I know it has been very difficult and knowing that we all are in pain of losing you, we all still love and miss you dearly. As I reflect on each day; it’s hard to embrace your absence as your presence on earth touched everyone that knew you…even though you were a silent soul you had your voice.
I love you, my son, As you will be so missed each and every day!
Your Mom – Forever and Forever
| Matthew's Mom |
©"My Saturday Angel"
By: Paula Miller
June 24, 2008
My Saturday Angel, didn't come with instructions when he was born, nor did I know that I would have to say goodbye to him when I was holding him close to me and singing to him those nursery rhymes. I never knew that those big brown eyes starring back at me would later not be there to look at for the remaining of my life...
My Saturday Angel, started crawling and then talking is when I realized I held the most precious gift from above. What do I need to do to keep my precious gift forever. Please God don't ever take him away...but he never say okay...I wish I could have said one more time "I LOVE YOU SON", but I didn't!
My Saturday Angel, lived life in the best way possible, he was kind-hearted, hid his feelings, quite and reserved, never once did he complain, nor talked bad about someone. He showed his pride in the way he talked, worked, and loved...
My Saturday Angel, may have had some life flawes, but most children do...that is why we need God to give us those life instructions to help us out. I ask myself, what could I have done to keep my Saturday Angel with me one more minute, hour, day, week, month, years. Why now...
My Saturday Angel, will always be my pride and joy to have and hold...as his mother I will always be proud of him for the acomplishments he completed in this life and I will remember them for the rest of my life.
For you see this is my Saturday Angel...
Matthew Wayne Felder.
| Matthew's Mom |
Today is June 9, 2008
I am sitting here sipping my coffee and wishing you are still here, I am needing your help to relax my mind as I need to understand so many things that doesn't make since to me as to how this really happened, I know the police report and the other reports are telling the same story, but you know me, I have to look at everything else. I just can't help it. I need to understand this. I know you came to me last night in my dreams and I wanted so much to grab you and hug you so much and not let go.
I just "HATE" this writing to you instead of talking to you over the phone. This is not right. You are to do your job here and not in heaven (at least not right now, you needed to wait until I get to be 100 years old and go to heaven before you do) you are to young to stay in the ground and your life had so much unfinished business to have died like this. I am not blaming you for drinking but walking back home and passing out on the railroad tracks, what were you thinking.
I know you didn't mean to do this, but sweetie, Mom is having a really hard time with this, her life has be turned upside down and my goodness I just want to die myself. But I have to keep telling myself that you are in a better place; and I have to see to it that Shannon is ok, he's really having a hard time also. Maria is such a great person, she is just hanging in there with Shannon and my goodness what a sweet person, I know God had her designed just for Shannon. I wish that God had someone designed for you, maybe you wouldn't be were you are today.
Well, I have to get up and go to work. I hope for a good day.
I loved you when you were born, I loved you growing up, and I will always have you at home in my heart, now and forever more and love you will always feel until we met again.
I Love you, 
Mom
| June 08, 2008 |
Good Morning My Son,
I wonder sometimes, why things happen for a reason or not. I am 3 days late in writing to you since this is the fifth month that you have left us behind. Some nights are really hard, especially on Saturday and Sundays. I never had a problem with those day until you left on Saturday morning and then having to identify you on sunday afternoon.
I know I am not to talk about you, but you are my first born and I don't think people understand this. It seems to me, that no one cares about me and how I am suffering through this. I don't hear from outside people to see how I am doing, but of course I forget they are "busy"...that might be it. Well, I know Your brother and and his wife are really suffering also. Father's day is coming up and it sure will not be the same without you sharing thoughts and sitting down to dinner or something like that.
I wish upon your star, that I could really find out what truly happened to you that night, it haunts me that you would pass out and never awoke again. I just can't shake this feeling. I keep wondering if you came to just before the accident or did you feel any pain. I pray to God about you all the time, and want you to be in heaven and not somewhere else, I don't know if I can handle anything else about this. Sometimes I listen to too many things and then my mind wonders...
I wonder what I have done, to slow down the activity of your site, is it not good enough, or pretty enough, or are there things that I have offended others over, You did have alot of visitors and candle lighters but now you are luck to get one or two a day and those are some of me; while others that have gone before you get tons of visitors and candle lighters every day. I don't understand this. I sure hope you are getting alot of attention from God. If not just keep in there son, he's got to pay attention to you, remember you are a Felder and we get attention, some how "Right"...
I am gratful for all the faithful visitors that do come and visit and is so gracious to lite a candle. But there is something missing that I am not doing. I am trying so hard to keep your memory alive, I just can't stop and forget about you ever. I wish upon your star that you are just as important to them as you are to me.
Last night I just couldn't go to sleep, it wasn't until 2 am this morning, I dozed off. I still had to get up early to feed the cats, and of course Chloe she could quick meowing. I went ahead and got up, feed them and then had my coffee. I miss you and I sitting out on the porch in the early morning having coffee and talking about little or big issues. I enjoyed that so much.
Well, I need to get up and get dressed, got to go to work at noon, which only leaves me a few mintues. Just remember I love you, even if some of your family doesn't want to check on you and tell you they miss and love you also. ( I do not mean your brother or sis-in-law) they are very faithful.
I understand that your Father is coming into town, and will be able to see your children, of course I have been left out of that event. I think he is up to his old stuff again, and you know what I mean.
I loved you when you were born, I loved you growing up, and I will always have you at home in my heart, now and forever more and love you will always feel until we met again.
I Love you,
Mom
| Matthew's Mom |
On May 2nd 1974, my son Matthew Wayne Felder was born.
The richness of life lies in the memories we have forgotten...
In the year 1974,
Remembering when...
1974 Timeline
January - 55 mph speed limit is imposed by Richard Nixon.
February - Cher files for separation from Sonny Bono.
March - The Grand Ole Opry House at Opryland is debuted.
April - Major League Baseball, Hank Aaron breaks
Babe Ruth's homerun record.
May - was the first Daytime Emy Awards was presented.
June - NFL grant franschise to Seattle Seahawks
July - The world's tallest structure, a 646 meter Polish radio mast, is completed.
August - President Richard Nixon announces his resignation.
September - President Gerald Ford pardons former President Nixon
of all federal crimes.
October - Frank Robinson becomes baseball's first
African American manager ( Cleveland Indians )
November - Watergate tapes shows that Nixon asked aides
to help protect him.
December - Popular Electronics display the Altair 8800 computers.
| Matthew's Mom |
" I Will Never Forget "
By: Paula Miller - Mom
Written: April 19, 2008
I will never forget our times shared together,
I will never forget your smile, I will never forget your warmth as I go through each day. I catch myself starring at the door wondering what it would be like if you came walking through the door or a simple phone call saying . . . " Hey mom, how are you"?
I will never forget God's gift "YOU"
I will never forget your likes and dislikes, I will never forget your ups and downs, I will never forget your hopes and dreams. I will never forget to smile when a flower blooms and it's our private conversation. I will never forget to stop and say "hello" when I see a butterfly on a sunny spring morn, I will never forget how you filled the room with your cologne, I will never forget how you loved to dress up, I will never forget the nights you stayed up watching a movie and eating your popcorn, I will never forget how many times you told me you love me, I will never forget how you would help me cook, I will never forget how you were working hard to make everything right, I will never forget how much you love your children and will never forget how you wanted to be apart of everyone's life. I will never forget how you were so excited when you caught fish for dinner or the adventure of hunting.
I will never forget how my heart stopped on January 5, 2008 when God called your name. I will never forget my son.. Some tell me that time will heal my broken heart, I know that can't be true, how can time heal my broken heart without you. I will always even as time continues love and miss you forever.
Your Mom...
| Paula Miller | Dancing in Heaven - by Your Mom (Paula) | January 5, 2012 |
| ROSE GM TO BRITTANY SYFERT | MATT, THINKING OF U & UR LOVED ONES | November 22, 2009 |
| Mum to Angel Michael Beetham | Sorry it's been so Long. Rox from Australia | September 27, 2009 |
Sorry, I haven't written in awhile. But I've been very busy. Not sure if I told you or not, but my Mother who was my rock after Michael died! Passed away on Sunday 26th July 2009! I think I've been on auto-pilot since! I do think about you and Matthew often, but other things always get in the way of me writing. I'm meant to be having my 2nd spinal fusion on Friday October 23rd, finger's crossed. Last time I was in pre-op all day waiting and they cancelled at the last minute! I will try to write soon, I haven't forgotten about you!
You know, I understand exactly how you feel about your son Matthew as I feel the same about my beloved son Michael. Not a day goes by that I do not think about him and wish and pray things could be different
I do still cry for him everyday as I'm sure you would for your precious son Matthew. Now obviously I have a new hole in my Heart with my Mum gone too. My one condolence is that I know they are now together! Like just isn't fair that's for sure!
Try to talk soon,
Kind Regards,
Rox
| Wendy ^Y^ Kevin Conatty Family | Happy 4th of July Hugs Wendy and Sarah | July 1, 2009 |
| CATHY~MOM OF DAVID GIRAUD | IN MY THOUGHTS & PRAYERS | May 29, 2009 |
